The human race´s most popular humor series returns with a new collection of macabre mishaps and misadventures. Honoring those who improve the gene pool by inadvertently removing themselves from it, this work shows how uncommon common sense still is. The hilarious New York Times bestselling phenomenon and the perfect funny gift! New York Times bestselling author Wendy Northcutt is back, asking, Have we evolved at all? The answer: Not all of us. What crazy cocktail of DNA leads Homo sapiens to do pull-ups off the edge of a seventh-floor balcony or wrap their lips around a paintball gun and pull the trigger? How about offering a beer to a bear or self-testing a Taser? Why not go joyriding in a shopping cart strapped to an SUV or jump a drawbridge on a bicycle? Fully illustrated with over a hundred new jaw-dropping and side-splitting feats of stupidity-and including science essays by guest writers and answers to FAQs about evolution in action-The Darwin Awards Next Evolution continues the tradition of honoring the victims of appallingly poor survival instinct who selflessly improve our gene pool by removing themselves from it.
What are you searching for in life? Is there a void that you are desperately attempting to fill? Are you wondering what might be next? The job, relationship, salary, title, status, and so much more have been the focal point of so many explorations. These things are sought after in hopes of bringing ultimate and sustaining joy. However, they never do. Ready, Fire, Aim is about one person?s journey to find sustainable joy by walking back into the one place he swore he would never return to. Through author Philip Floor?s stories and the lessons he learned, you too can discover a way to fill the void that will never run empty again. Philip shows how there can be true and sustainable joy found in simply walking back into the local church and saying yes. If you want to make this life worth it?and if what you have been doing isn?t working?open this book. If you are skeptical, remember these words. Expecting things to change, without being willing to change, will result in no change?because nothing changed. It?s time to make a change. Philip?s challenge to you is simple: return to the one place you don?t want to go back to, say yes, and ask questions later. Ready, fire, aim.
Duchlan Castle is a gloomy, forbidding place in the Scottish Highlands. Late one night the body of Mary Gregor, is found in the castle, stabbed to death in her bedroom - but the room is locked from within and the windows are barred. The only clue to the culprit is a silver fish´s scale, left on the floor next to Mary´s body.
In suburban Georgetown a killer´s Reeboks whisper on the front floor of a posh home... In a seedy D.C. porno house a patron is swiftly garroted to death... The next day America learns that two of its Supreme Court justices have been assassinated. And in New Orleans, a young law student prepares a legal brief... To Darby Shaw it was no more than a legal shot in the dark, a brilliant guess. To the Washington establishment it was political dynamite. Suddenly Darby is witness to a murder -- a murder intended for her. Going underground, she finds there is only one person she can trust -- an ambitious reporter after a newsbreak hotter than Watergate -- to help her piece together the deadly puzzle. Somewhere between the bayous of Louisiana and the White House´s inner sanctums, a violent cover-up is being engineered. For somone has read Darby´s brief. Someone who will stop at nothing to destroy the evidence of an unthinkable crime.
How well can you ever really know someone? As Ben Casper watches his best friend plummet from her sixth-floor apartment balcony, he realises his life is about to change. Diana had no reason to kill herself, she had to have been pushed. Diana worked for the CIA, so the investigation into her death is kept tightly under wraps. But Ben is a political journalist, and can feel that something isn t right. Ben starts investigating for himself and soon discovers Diana was leading a double life he knew nothing about. But when more people involved die in questionable circumstances, it s clear that someone doesn t want the truth to be uncovered. And unless Ben drops his investigation, he could be next
Where can you find the 5 most irresistible indoor street food trucks in Berlin? What are the 5 best shops if you´re looking for Berlin fashion? And what are the 5 most beautiful parks with a genuine Berlin spirit? The 500 Hidden Secrets of Berlin reveals these good-to-know addresses and many more. It´s an affectionate guide to the city ; written by Berlin explorer Nathalie Dewalhens. She has selected places and details that few people know ; like an open-air bar next to the river Spree with a wooden dance floor and a fairytale hut ; a crane house with a café ; located in a post-GDR industrial area ; or a beautiful tango venue in a former warehouse from 1908. This is a book for visitors who want to avoid the usual tourist spots and for residents who are keen to track down the city´s best-kept secrets. After having travelled the world Nathalie Dewalhens now considers Berlin as her home. She is working on her first novel there ; preferably while sipping a latte in a bar. Philip Bögle is a Berlin based photographer who thinks of his hometown as a city that never sleeps ; and as the perfect place to live and work ; capturing moments ; people and fashion.
He knew something he was listening/watching was poisoning and killing him. Slowly. Painfully. Sinking into a gradual depression and dying of apathy. He´d seen this happen to others. Suicide, drug overdose. All a permanent solution to a very temporary problem. Then she showed up. Not your typical haunting ghost or vindictive spirit. Different. In a good way. She´d come just to solve his mystery - the one he didn´t know he had. It was a haunting problem she didn´t know if she could even help solve. But she owed him this chance to solve himself. Now she was calling on people he had saved from themselves to come and intervene in his life, his mystery. To expose the secrets he didn´t want anyone knowing - especially himself. Excerpt: I was sitting in my tiny cabin, depressed. I couldn´t even write. And that was my living. If I didn´t solve it soon, much worse would happen. Then the screen of my laptop flopped down on the desk, black and dead. When I stood up to see what had happened, I found the screen was completely disconnected. Wires seemed clipped between it and the base. Then my rolling chair fell apart. Not just the back or the arms, but everything. Completely disassembled on the floor. The table was next. I was able to scoop up my mug of honey-sweetened coffee just as it started to slide off the leaning table top - following the remains of my now unworking laptop. Stepping back carefully, to avoid tripping on the chair parts, I watched the legs of the once-sturdy wooden table simply fold under as the desktop crashed to the floor. Behind me, the coat rack fell with slightly less noise, as the coat, jacket, and caps all muffled the noise as they fell on top of the work-boots and tall mud boots. I was wondering about the couch and the small kitchenette, but then felt the floor sag and the roof separate from the walls with a widening crack - as the sky beyond appeared between them. Then I started sliding, as the narrow hooked rug under my feet lost any grip on the sealed decking beneath it... - - - - My eyes opened. I was back in my fold-out couch-bunk. Turning to look at the rest of the room, I saw it was still intact. The usual. And relaxed in the darkness of the early morning. Just another bad dream. A nightmare. My world literally falling apart. Before I could consider turning over, or getting up instead, a shimmering appeared by the door - with a bright light that was almost blinding. ´´Hello, John.´´ A very feminine voice, warm and contralto, was reassuring - even though I had my arm covering my eyes against the too-bright light. ´´Oh, sorry - just wanted to brighten things, but let it get out of hand. Too used to pitch-black caves, I guess.´´ The light dimmed and my eyes started adjusting to the room´s now-normal lighting. Before I could make out her figure, the woman behind that voice sat on my bunk. Through the layers of covers and comforter, I could feel her form next to my legs. Her slight weight moved the light couch-bunk frame as she adjusted - and I moved over to give her more room and comfort on the narrow bunk. As my eyes became accustomed, I could make out her dark russet hair she´d braided and coiled about her head in a form of peasant style. Her green vest and sheer sleeves reminded me of someone... Scroll Up and Get Your Copy Now
Nothing Unusual is about eight teenagers or preteens aged twelve to seventeen who spend three days at a fall camp in Strawberry, Arizona. As they spend their first night there, they chilled out by the campfire and had a conversation about their usual fears?things that have always given them the creeps since they were kids. Lauren (age twelve) fears dolls, Martin (age fourteen) fears Santa Claus, Ronald (age fifteen) fears clowns and mimes, Dakota (age thirteen) fears amusement-park rides, Cory (age thirteen) fears animatronics, Gavin (age sixteen) fears the Easter Bunny, Chastity (age fifteen) fears bugs, and Ruth (age seventeen) fears failing a test. After dinnertime was over on the second day, they all started encountering the fears they were talking about at the campfire. They thought they were having bad dreams or were just imagining things, but no, after all their encounters were over, Ruth (the smart one of the group) investigated why they all had those unusual visions that were not just visions. The mystery behind it all was that their dessert and drinks had been drugged without any of them realizing it. A twenty-eight-year-old lady named Tevin, who also allowed them to stay at the camp and cooked their food, overheard their conversation at the campfire. Because Tevin doesn?t like kids or teenagers, she decided to put marijuana into their brownies and mixed LSD in their punch the next day so they would hallucinate their nightmares. As they got high and paranoid from the weed and LSD, Tevin placed them all in separate locations with their feared objects next to them. She placed Dakota on a seat on a roller coaster in an abandoned amusement park in the forest. She left Gavin sitting in the woods with an Easter basket next to him. She placed Ruth on a desk with a paper marked with an F in front of her. She left Martin tucked lean on a couch with a Santa animatronic next to him. She placed Lauren sitting on the floor in a crisscross-applesauce position in a room with a creepy doll sitting in a rocking chair in front of her. She placed Cory in a different room sitting in a toy box filled with stuffed animals of the Five Nights at Freddy?s animatronics. Lastly, she placed Ronald standing in front of a mirror with a balloon, a music box with a mime in it, and a papier-mâché clown head in the room. These were how they all encountered their fears until the hallucination wore off. Tevin was arrested for the drugging she did on all of them. Classic advice?don?t do drugs, kids! Watch your drinks and be aware who makes your food and make sure he/she is not a psychopath.
Sweeney Todd is a barber who murders his customers and turns their remains into meat pies sold at the pie shop of Mrs. Lovett, his partner in crime. His barber shop is situated in Fleet Street, London, next to St. Dunstan´s church, and is connected to Lovett´s pie shop in nearby Bell Yard by means of an underground passage. Todd dispatches his victims by pulling a lever while they are in his barber chair, which makes them fall backward down a revolving trapdoor and generally causes them to break their necks or skulls on the cellar floor below. If the victims are still alive, he goes to the basement and ´´polishes them off´´ by slitting their throats with his straight razor.
This eBook edition of ´´The String of Pearls - Tale of Sweeney Todd´´ has been formatted to the highest digital standards and adjusted for readability on all devices. Sweeney Todd is a barber who murders his customers and turns their remains into meat pies sold at the pie shop of Mrs. Lovett, his partner in crime. His barber shop is situated in Fleet Street, London, next to St. Dunstan´s church, and is connected to Lovett´s pie shop in nearby Bell Yard by means of an underground passage. Todd dispatches his victims by pulling a lever while they are in his barber chair, which makes them fall backward down a revolving trapdoor and generally causes them to break their necks or skulls on the cellar floor below. If the victims are still alive, he goes to the basement and ´´polishes them off´´ by slitting their throats with his straight razor.